Archive for July, 2008

Calvin Trillin

« 31 July 2008 | 20:15 | Uncategorized | No Comments »

The most remarkable thing about my mother is that for thirty years she served the family nothing but leftovers. The original meal has never been found.



Mark Eckman

« 30 July 2008 | 15:58 | Uncategorized | No Comments »

I have a spelling checker It came with my PC It highlights for my review Mistakes I cannot sea. I ran this poem thru it I’m sure your pleased to no Its letter perfect in it’s weigh My checker told me sew. There are a number of different versions, extensions and derivatives of this poem […]



E E Cummings

« 29 July 2008 | 9:29 | Uncategorized | No Comments »

If they give you lined paper, write the other way.



Eric Hoffer

« 28 July 2008 | 7:05 | Uncategorized | No Comments »

When people are free to do as they please, they usually imitate each other. Originality is deliberate and forced, and partakes of the nature of a protest.



Robert Fulford

« 27 July 2008 | 11:14 | Uncategorized | No Comments »

A print addict is a man who reads in elevators. People occasionally look at me curiously when they see me standing there, reading a paragraph or two as the elevator goes up. To me, it’s curious that there are people who do not read in elevators. What can they be thinking about?



John Boyle O’Reilly

« 26 July 2008 | 11:11 | Uncategorized | No Comments »

A White Rose The red rose whispers of passion, And the white rose breathes of love; O the red rose is a falcon, And the white rose is a dove. But I send you a cream-white rosebud With a flush on its petal tips; For the love that is purest and sweetest Has a kiss […]



Samuel Butler

« 25 July 2008 | 19:50 | Uncategorized | No Comments »

It has been said that whilst God cannot alter the past, historians can; it perhaps because they can be useful to Him in this respect that He tolerates their existence.



David Dixon

« 24 July 2008 | 12:25 | Uncategorized | No Comments »

Haiku Error Message Three things are certain: Death, taxes, and lost data. Guess which has occurred.



Horace Mann

« 23 July 2008 | 20:16 | Uncategorized | No Comments »

Habit is a cable; we weave a thread of it each day, and at last we cannot break it.



Don Paterson

« 21 July 2008 | 22:16 | Uncategorized | No Comments »

A life lived in the margins and the footnotes of himself – his epitaph: He Digressed



John Godfrey Saxe

« 19 July 2008 | 17:31 | Uncategorized | No Comments »

The Blind Men and the Elephant It was six men of Indostan To learning much inclined, Who went to see the Elephant (Though all of them were blind), That each by observation Might satisfy his mind The First approached the Elephant, And happening to fall Against his broad and sturdy side, At once began to […]



Carl Sandburg

« 19 July 2008 | 17:31 | Uncategorized | No Comments »

Elephants Are Different to Different People Wilson and Pilcer and Snack stood before the zoo elephant. Wilson said, “What is its name? Is it from Asia or Africa? Who feeds it? Is it a he or a she? How old is it? Do they have twins? How much does it cost to feed? How much […]



Baltasar Gracian

« 18 July 2008 | 18:10 | Uncategorized | No Comments »

Good things, when short, are twice as good.



D H Lawrence

« 17 July 2008 | 21:26 | Uncategorized | No Comments »

Oh, words are action good enough, if they’re the right words.



William Blake

« 17 July 2008 | 19:50 | Uncategorized | No Comments »

If you trap the moment before it is ripe The tears of repentance will certainly wipe But if once you let the ripe moment go You can never wipe off the tears of woe.



G K Chesterton

« 15 July 2008 | 13:12 | Uncategorized | No Comments »

A stiff apology is a second insult… The injured party does not want to be compensated because he has been wronged; he wants to be healed because he has been hurt.



H M Tomlinson

« 14 July 2008 | 14:08 | Uncategorized | No Comments »

“Almost any book does for a bed-book,” a woman once said to me. I nearlly replied in a hurry that almost any woman would do for a wife; but that is not the way to bring people to conviction of sin.



Richard Rumbold

« 13 July 2008 | 19:41 | Uncategorized | No Comments »

I never could believe that Providence had sent a few men into the world, ready booted and spurred to ride, and millions ready saddled and bridled to be ridden.



Sir Walter Ralegh

« 12 July 2008 | 16:33 | Uncategorized | No Comments »

Sir Walter Ralegh To His Son Three things there be that prosper up apace, And flourish while they grow asunder far; But on a day, they meet all in a place, And when they meet, they one another mar. And they be these: the Wood, the Weed, the Wag: The Wood is that that makes […]



A A Milne

« 11 July 2008 | 7:17 | Uncategorized | No Comments »

The more he looked inside the more Piglet wasn’t there.



Cyril Connolly

« 10 July 2008 | 14:40 | Uncategorized | No Comments »

There are many who dare not kill themselves for fear of what the neighbors will say.



Ogden Nash

« 9 July 2008 | 7:10 | Uncategorized | No Comments »

The Octopus Tell me, O Octopus, I begs Is those things arms, or is they legs? I marvel at thee, Octopus; If I were thou, I’d call me Us.



George Norman Douglas

« 8 July 2008 | 12:36 | Uncategorized | No Comments »

It seldom pays to be rude. It never pays to be only half-rude.



Billy Collins

« 7 July 2008 | 12:31 | Uncategorized | No Comments »

Sonnet All we need is fourteen lines, well, thirteen now, and after this one just a dozen to launch a little ship on love’s storm-tossed seas, then only ten more left like rows of beans. How easily it goes unless you get Elizabethan and insist the iambic bongos must be played and rhymes positioned at […]



Karl Popper

« 3 July 2008 | 20:15 | Uncategorized | No Comments »

We may become the makers of our fate when we have ceased to pose as its prophets.



The Frog

« 2 July 2008 | 20:22 | Uncategorized | No Comments »

What a wonderful bird the frog are! When he stand he sit almost; When he hop he fly almost. He ain’t got no sense hardly; He ain’t got no tail hardly either. When he sit, he sit on what he ain’t got almost.



Letter to the Editor

« 1 July 2008 | 6:49 | Uncategorized | No Comments »

(to the Times) Sir, I see that every Christmas Handel gave “live” performances of his Messiah (The Register October 16). But then he would, wouldn’t he? Yours faithfully E W Lighton Crewe, October 16